I have to admit that I've felt a little lost about how to maintain + grow hope in myself + those closest to me lately. The consuming tidal wave of disregard for humanity feels so hopeless, and despair offers nothing to counter that devouring force. Small actions seem almost irrelevant, but even as I think that...I know they have value to the ones who receive them + to me too. 

It is true that we, the ones with access to food + clean water + bombless sleep, have a responsibility to hope. In the spirit of Meg McElwee's hope-making bucket list (in her latest email newsletter), I began creating my own. I felt like I owed it to all of us.

Very quickly, I began to think of recent experiences that could be viewed through that same hope stirring lens...ways that I've experienced (known!) hope recently! I mean- exciting! I'm sharing both lists in hopes that the practice can spark more + more lists + imagining + hope.

Things that have stirred hope recently:

• Going to a Mumford + Sons concert in the pouring rain - a communal experience
• Standing by the glassy Atlantic, listening to the water lap the shore softly - gentle grandeur
• Conversations with people I don't know very well - finding common ground
• Eating Julia's delicious cooking experiments - tasting a blooming interest
• Spotting humming birds in the garden - shifting lawn to a thriving ecosystem
• Attending a sprawling event Jo took part in organizing - witnessing embodied vision
• Cheering for a friend's dream coming true - borrowing joy
• Participating in the heaviness of aging + decline - knowing love
• Dreaming about bringing a new purpose to life - imagining possibility

My hope stirring to-do list:

• Knowing that there is room for love in every situation + proving it
• Eating at our local, Palestinian restaurant
• Leaving stretches of unscheduled, spacious time 
• Showing up for my mom + dad in ways that are meaningful to them
• Making a piece of clothing that I'd normally purchase readymade
• Experimenting with ways to decrease my "needs"
• Painting + painting + painting
• Stretching + moving in ways that feel good
• Leading with acceptance in some current circumstances 
• Riding my bike with a smile on my face

I've come away from this exercise realizing that hope can be sparked in so many ways: collective experience, tuning in to nature, eye contact, unscheduled time, imagining new ways + putting these new ways into practice to name a few. I vow to put myself in these situations as much as I possibly can. See you there!

Love,
Jane

For me freedom is wealth.

What if you just shook up the formula + thought of doing it in a different way, 
a smaller way?
~Jesse Kamm
​

I came across this again today + it felt like a beckoning. Wanna play along? Here's my version:

Embrace the soft pants. 
Find a style or two to love + wear the heck out of them. I'm loving pairs from Sokoi + these from Imogene + Willie. They take me from my yoga mat to a coffee hang to work to a night out. This summer I'm wearing them with tank tops. In the colder months they cozy up with little sweatshirts + big pullovers.

Whatever your age is, enjoy living.
The age that I am is rarely exactly how I thought it would be. When I was younger, I thought that people who were the age I am now knew who they were + weren't easily made to doubt it. These years have involved some tangles for me in that department. I have a list of things I want to be, and I try to revisit it daily. I recognize myself in this list + I'm reminded that this self is beautiful.

Skip, if it feels right.
One day my partner + I held hands as we left Target + skipped out into the parking lot. We were just happy + laughing + when we got to our car a man told us that seeing that did his heart good. It was just such an unselfconscious, playful moment. It did our hearts good too.

Splurging can mean different things.
There have been moments in my life when a shared slurpie on a 95F degree day or a shared donut on a random afternoon have been true splurges. I remember those moments decades later, because they really did feel so splurgy + extra sweet. 

Find a pair (or two) of signature shoes. 
My partner + I both believe that the classics (our classics) are the best shoes. He's always worn Vans. We were 19 when we met, and his Vans were purple. Today, I own three pairs of Birks + wear a pair every day.

Figure out what works for your skin.
I'll sing the praises of Everyday Oil until the day I die. I use it morning + night, never use soap on my face (unless I go for a really sweaty bike ride or something). Since I started using Everyday Oil, acne flares + flaky skin are no longer issues. It costs less than so many other products, and its packaging is beautiful, reusable + recyclable.

And then (pretty much) skip the make up.
Lip balm + mascara + done. I only ever wore makeup to cover acne. I was always envious of the fresh faced girls in junior high + high school. Lipstick was fun, but kissing my babies without leaving a mark was even more fun.

Whether it's creating a home or your style, do it yourself.
We never had much money, but I always thought that the homiest, coziest, most nourishing spaces were simplest ones. When we moved into a new place (+ we did plenty of that), I'd remove the window coverings, add a lick of white paint + tape the girls' artwork to the walls. Catalog pages would become paper chains for birthdays. Furniture rescued from the side of the road would get recovered with scrap fabric or painted it with leftover paint. Shorts were made out of thrifted skirts + a tops were made out of sweat-stained, button down shirts. Candles are lit, pancakes are made, music is turned up + we dance...still.

Trim all the excess fat.
Once I started reading about environmentalism, minimalism + the working conditions of garment workers, I realized that our monetary limitations could be reinterpreted in my mind as personal choice. This felt quite empowering. I'd always loved thrifting + making + camping + old houses. Now they have an even deeper purpose + meaning. I can't change all that is wrong in the world, but I can change my actions.

That was fun. It feels like I can see myself a little bit more clearly now, and it gives me motivation to embrace all that is simple + good in this life of mine. Wishing you the same!

Much love,
Jane

I'm the type of gardener who plants things + mostly waits to see what nature does with it. There's no round-up to bend things to my will. There are squirrels that dig + rabbits that multiply. Chipmunks + skinks scurry. Bees buzz. 

I do not want to do battle with nature. We weed...some. We water...some. Things that were planted last year or the year before emerge. I don't remember all the names that humans gave them. They are beautiful.

One day, I exclaimed at the bright purple blossoms that appeared. It rained for days + the purple blossoms disappeared. And then, an evening visit to the garden revealed why this purple seems to appear + disappear. They close at night! Of course! 

The recognition felt like a message:

• the drawing in is where the power lies
• the drawing in enables the resilience of the beauty
• the drawing in is at least as beautiful as the outward facing beauty

Love,
​Jane

How are you feeling? I wish I could listen to your reply.

I'm horrified. I'm sad. I'm bewildered. I feel like we've been living in a state of defeat for years. I've been feeling like less words are necessary. I'm less interested in reading things that end up where I already know I am. 

We know that we need to dig in right where we are. When I feel like that's not helping, I try to remember the light experienced:

• having a short conversation made me feel connected...they probably felt that too
• going to a county dems meeting reminded me that there are others who think similarly, have already been hard at work, are paying attention, are fired up + ready to go...my presence probably did the same for them
• receiving a response from my representative reminded me that I can communicate + be heard...she may have received a bit of encouragement + strength from those words
• digging trenches for potatoes + settling each mass into the soil felt like hope for the future...this act was participation in the regenerative abilities already in each potato

We are here to participate in our mutual flourishing. Yours matters to me.

Much love,
Jane

Simple has become one of my favorite words. Making my clothing simple, my home simple, my skincare simple...each one of these endeavors has influenced my thinking beyond the scope of the project itself. As things become more simple, fog lifts, priorities shift + values come into focus. Over time this can offer a sort of settling to the mind. I long for simplicity to inject all aspects of my life with this sense of peace.

And yet, I find that much of what feels unsettled within has to do with two opposing forces pushing + pulling. There is goodness to the practice of slowing down + focusing in on small moments that bring us joy. A tiny, new leaf in spring or a smile from a stranger can flood our spirits with elation. At the same time, there is goodness in zooming out enough to understand our smallness. A giant cumulus cloud or bright light near the moon (that must be a planet!) can jolt our gloom into perspective.

I like using my creative skills + passion at work. It makes me feel like I'm creating beauty, contributing to a team + have purpose. And I need blocks of gentle, spacious time to refuel + to use my creative skills + passion in different directions. In order to find wellbeing, I need to stay engaged with thoughts toward where + how I am spending my energy.

I've been coming to realizations like this over + over again. There is no simplifying to the point of settling some (maybe most) things in this life. Being alive involves almost constant readjusting, rebalancing + rethinking. Knowing my simple, overall objective (love!) certainly helps move me toward peace, but I cannot simplify myself into complete stillness + rest. Life is engagement with things like:

• zooming in + zooming out
• focused work + gentle, spacious time
• movement + rest
• effort + acceptance

Ram Dass wrote, "You can do it like it's a great weight on you, or you can do it like it's part of the dance." I guess I'm also trying to remember that the dance is not optional.

Love,
​Jane

We're in that vacuum-three-times-a-day, sneeze-five-times-in-a-row, to-do-list-never-ends time of a live-in-it-while-the-work-gets-done project. And yet...as I walked past + saw that pile of brown paper against the subfloor, I saw a kind of beauty in the texture + shadow.

As I walked back to grab my phone, I saw more + more beauty. The photos were collected quickly. Nothing was moved + not much photo editing was done...but the beauty is there...is here...right here in the in-between.

Love,
​Jane

• take a walk
• bake a cake to share
• restock the bird feeder
• sit in the sun
• sit with your favorite drink
• look at the sky
• hug someone you love a little longer than usual
• pet a dog or cat
• smile at a stranger
• light a candle
• listen to well-chosen music 
• do sun salutations
• find a good leaf
• greet a ladybug
• air dry some laundry
• change the sheets
• let someone know you are thinking of them
• eat fruit
• be still
• dance wild
• read familiar, good words
• clean out your bag
• take a picture of a houseplant
• tell your children something you love about them
• paint with watercolors
• plan a meet-up
• massage your partner's hands
• wear colorful socks
• notice the moon

Love is here.
Beauty is here.

Much love,
​Jane

The evening ritual I am in pursuit of involves:

• connection
• stretching
• recording gratitude
• a good drink

My partner + I both work jobs that keep us on our feet with minds darting from task to task. By the time we get home, we just want to plop down + not move. This little set of rituals is helping us bring a bit more intention into our evenings. We'd pretty much already mastered the connection + the additional hydration, but we knew that an evening stretch could benefit our bodies.

We love our Vessel journalling + had been sporadically doing it on the weekends. When Jo mentioned that she had finished hers by doing it every night, I knew I wanted to bring it into my every day. 

My partner + I decided to take on this challenge together, and we talked through the reasons we weren't currently getting to all of these desirable actions on a daily basis. We agreed to a time that we'd both be ready in the morning + a time that we'd head off to bed at night (in order to not be too tired in the morning). Are we perfect? Nope. Have we managed to show up for our ritual reset more often than before? For sure! And that feels pretty great!

Love,
​Jane

Rituals are intriguing + beautiful. Rituals have the ability to bring us home to ourselves...to reconnect us to our truest selves, to our core values, to our people. Anything can become a ritual just by mentally moving it into that category. This feels so mind-clearing-ly simple + so all encompassing-ly beautiful.

Bringing ritual to my mornings feels like transforming my to-do list into a sacred practice. Each element contains an inherent beauty. Each moment is a gift holding possibility, peace, love + transformation.

I've been having fun with week long challenges. A week feels like a manageable time commitment period for me, short enough to hold my focus + long enough to have some feel for the effects of the action. If I'm honest, I do want these practices to become habits + habits take 30 days to form...blah, blah...but the bite-sized, week-long shift idea is working for me...so that's that.  :) It's a good place to start anyway.

Simplicity is a good tool for my scattered mind, so I kept my ritual list simple + uncomplicated. Each morning, as best I can, I want to:

• take in good words
• journal
• meditate
• stretch

The good words may come in the form of a daily newsletter, a podcast excerpt previously saved, a quote written in my journal, or a chapter or page of a good book. Journalling helps me listen, process, internalize + prioritize. We've been experimenting with meditation + are staying curious about its benefits for us. And I feel like slow stretching + a few sun salutations just opens me up mentally + physically.

I truly feel the benefits of these intentional practices throughout the day. It's like I've touched who I want to be...or nearish...and I feel a bit more tethered to it. My harmony is coming into focus little by little by little.

Love,
​Jane

Hopefully the idea that these tonics are not recipes, but permission to play with what is on hand is coming through. The mint leaves here are from our garden. They dried the first time I brought them inside before I could decide how to use them. Simple. They make the best tasting mint tea I've ever tasted, and they are so plentiful that I feel like I can play around with them to my heart's content. Today I added a dried orange slice, honey + the juice of leftover lime. After that steeps in a little water from the kettle, I will top it off with tap water + chill it in the fridge.

I find so much satisfaction in throwing a little of this in with a glug of that...all whole foods...often a feast for the eyes, a treat for the nose + a joy to the tastebuds. The creative act of making these tonics elicits at least as much joy for me as does the consuming. I find more freedom here than with my usual meal making, because often other's tastes don't need to be considered. (Though I often make enough to share.)

This feels like a luxurious permission. I'm a person who spends a lot of time happily trying to be empathetic + compassionate. This act of love toward myself need not be labeled selfish or exclusionary. It is simply nourishing in a way that feeds so many parts of me in small, yet meaningful, ways.

Love,
​Jane