I'm learning so much lately about letting go...loosening my grip...accepting that I am not in control.

Minimalism is often described as letting go of what isn't important, so we can make space for what is important. The practice of minimalism has enabled me to (along with my partner) raise my girls on a single, low income and to move overseas (twice). I've become very good at letting go of things in order to gain something else.

Lately, however, the letting go seems to have more to do with a lack of choice. It is more about accepting other's choices that affect me in impactful ways. I'm experiencing this both in my personal relationships, and in the greater societal context. I doubt I'm unique in that.

Today I read that nihilism (the belief that existence is pointless) is currently pervasive in the US. This from a nation that had 90% of people identifying as Christians in the early 1990's. The arguments that nothing has changed + everything has changed each have their validity. Personally, I'm just tired of being endlessly indignant. I'm not sure, but that feels adjacent to acceptance somehow. I don't like that either.

Years ago, I planted mint in our garden. It did well + looked great...until it started to come up in the middle of every plant around it. A few years after I planted it, I decided it had to go. It is just too invasive. Even now, every time I go out into the garden, I spot stray mint in the middle of one plant or another. I can't control it. So I pull it + make mint tea.

I have to admit that I'm trying to find the lesson as I write this. Hmmm. Let it be? Live + let live? Sure, but that doesn't really offer any promise of any good coming from the unchosen. I don't want to be a nihilist, so I want to find the good.

I'm reminded of The Overstory by Richard Powers. We understand the breadth of the forest's story by understanding how many human lifetimes come + go during its lifespan. If we humans are nature, and nature's story is so much bigger + longer than each one of us...then maybe we are just here to participate in the good that is...the good that goes on + on...and to make a little mint tea along the way. I think I can live with that.  

Much love,
​Jane

In my perfect sustainable wardrobe scenario, I would have a modest number of pieces that I love. I'd wear them, repair them + wear them out. The worn out pieces would simply be replaced seasonally.

Unfortunately, my experience is a bit messier than that. Sometimes I try things that don't end up getting worn as much as I'd like. Luckily, secondhand clothing is cool, so I can often resell even my secondhand purchases. 

A few ways to let things go + earn:

• list things for sale on a resale site :: like Poshmark, Noihsaf Baazar or Ebay :: I usually do this with my name brand things. I try to price them enticingly, so that they move quickly. My goal is to get things worn.
• list + earn credit on a brand's resale site :: like Outerknown, Doen or Patagonia :: We do this with my partner's clothing, since it seems like the more direct route for men's wear. Again, price to move.
• bring a bag of things to a local resale shop :: like Buffalo Exchange, Arizona Trading or Plato's Closet :: These places like certain brands + styles (mall resale?) that the shops reflect. 
• send a bag of things to a listing site :: like Thredup :: It's a time saver, because they do the listing.
• bring worn jeans to Madewell for savings on your next pair of jeans :: If a brand works, stick with it. There are lots of fair-trade certified jeans at Madewell.
• consign at a local consignment shop 
• attend a clothing swap :: Instant out-with-the-old/in-with-the-new-to-you gratification. Don't be afraid to come home with less than you brought. :) The leftovers can be donated.
• have a well-curated yard sale with a few friends :: Again, agree to donate what's left before you start! :)
• (a note on those bag-up-your-discards + send-them-to-us-for-a-discount-on-our-site offers :: My thought is that my donations probably do more good in my town rather than accumulating in Los Angeles. They seem like a recipe for bailing + sending overseas. If I donate in my town, it saves on transportation too.) 

When we value selling this way, we are also exposed to purchasing this way. Secondhand shopping is not only easier on our budget, but it keeps things out of the landfill + extends the value of the resources (soil, crops, water, dyes, power, transportation) + work (of farmers + garment workers) already used! Yay!!

I often let my selling earnings get absorbed into our big budget, but this year I kept those earnings separate + used them as the budget for my shopping list. By keeping my wants small, I was able to recycle my budget as well as my clothing this season. This doesn't make anything free. That money was money I spent, but it does feel like recycling much of its value. That feels pretty good!

Love,
Jane

I will live the best I can discern today. 
Tomorrow I may find out I was wrong.
Since I do not live by being right,
I am not destroyed by being wrong.
​~Verna Dozier

Life seems to be asking for less seriousness lately, and I've been trying to heed the call. This purchase felt like an act of lightness + play...an honoring of craft + creativity...a reminder to experience joy.

I saw it at a once-a-month, thrift event after work with Jo, and no doubt, that atmosphere contributed to my exuberance over it. It was dark metal (which isn't really my thing) + I wasn't certain I wanted it over my couch (though I've been hunting for something fun to put there)...but I just fell for the joyful, handmade, imperfect perfection of it. Someone made this with their hands! My heart swells.

I considered painting it either white or cobalt blue and impulsively painted it the next morning before work (deciding I could paint over it if I wanted the darker color). I love how the rust came through, and it was nailed it up the next day. I thought maybe I'd have Jo type, "hihi" (a favorite greeting we adopted after watching Sunny) + tape the tiny paper up inside the frame. Weeks went by + that hasn't happened, so today I decided to see if I could attach things with magnets. Satisfying. Playful. Not too serious. One of a kind. I like it.

Love,
​Jane

While cleaning the other day, I picked up a deck of cards. "Transformation" was the card on top + "monkey" was on the bottom. What a perfect concept, I thought. Monkey mind as the enemy of transformation. I decided to draw a card, even as I thought that I'd already received enough to consider. I drew "practice". Oh! What a perfect complement. If monkey mind is the detractor from transformation, practice is the movement toward it. I've been looking for ways to practice ever since.

Painting is one of my favorite practices of settling + play. Even ten minutes of painting helps to move me into a different mind space. I do it for pure enjoyment. I let myself do what feels good. There is no one else to please. There is no one telling me that they wanted something else from me. My mind calms while I paint, and what I paint makes me happy. That's all. :)

Love,
Jane​

If I had to name the thing that I emphasize most about the fairdare in my own closet, it would probably be keeping the inventory lean. I'm not extreme about it, but I do try to be aware of overconsumption. This is not a directive, it is just an acknowledgment. I think there are many ways to take the fairdare (emphasizing thrifted clothing, making one's own clothing or wearing a uniform to name a few). Most of us will utilize some combination of ethical + sustainable practices, and that is beautiful.

In keeping a tight edit of pieces, I lean toward pieces that fall into a color palette so that they mix + match. Mine is mainly white, natural, olive + denim. I may love a new color or pattern that shows up out there, but rarely (+ usually only as an accessory) does it have much longevity in my closet. So when I found a pair of organic cotton, made-in-California shorts that I liked + they were only available in black, white + cornflower, I figured the black + white ones were the ones for me.

I decided that I would wear the white ones mostly at home (to keep them clean) + the black ones for curb sitting outings, biking, gardening + camping. It sounded like a good plan until I wore the black ones on a weekend camping trip + realized that I just didn't feel very cute wearing them. It probably sounds ridiculous, but I decided to honor that + sold them. Someone bought them right away, and I hope they love the heck out of them this summer!

I decided to see if I could change my mind about the cornflower, because I was not finding any other shorts that I liked the fit + feel of as much.

• I thought about how I would wear them. I like them with a white tee or tank.
• I noted that I'm attracted to other bright colors this season. 
• I noticed an Eastern Bluebird in our yard + that its gorgeous feathers are a version of that cornflower blue. I actually think that's what did it for me. This kind of blows my mind. I was actually inspired by nature. :)

I'm not sure if this thought exercise contradicts the concept of wardrobe authenticity, but I'm curious + learning...so I'm interested to see what happens. (It also made me smile to look down + see that I'm practically sitting on a cornflower, yoga towel I bought years ago, because they only had a few colors to choose from. Add that to the list above.)  :)

Love,
Jane

On the lookout for warm weather pieces, I found both of these secondhand (on Poshmark). I bought the black + white top first and it just feels like me. When the tan + white dress version showed up in my search, I was confident that I'd love it too. Once I received it, it was clear that it was lighter weight + too sheer to wear as anything other than a swimsuit cover-up. 

I wasn't sure it would sell particularly well (because I bought it cheap + there was another one available) + knew I'd get more use out of it as a top, so I picked the stitching out of the kangaroo pocket on the front + hemmed it at the same length as the other top. I'm not sure that I would have bought two such similar tops, but I do like them both and the price was good. 

I love finding secondhand pieces from my favorite fair brands. These tops are nice quality cotton, made in California, and have plenty of life left in them! 

I'm still a bit in the process of trying to put this go around of seasonal wardrobe settling to rest. I've gone through all of my pieces, let go + sold things. I have a little bit of a budget now from those sales, and I have an idea of where the holes are in my wardrobe:

• comfy shorts
• tops to wear to work
• a tiny bag that meets event requirements (woohoo! summer!)
• a pair of comfy, yet cute(?) trainers

As ever, I want to try to make minimal purchases that feel authentic + will be worn for a long time. I've realized lately that my tendency to take cues from others (in an effort to be empathetic) has morphed into something adjacent to acting for the approval of others. This is one reason authenticity feels enlightening at the moment. Remembering to emphasize the true inspiration that comes from looking within myself + my wardrobe feels exceedingly important. 

I find that answering these two questions provide so much peace + direction:

If I could only wear one outfit during non-work hours + didn't worry about how others interpret it, what would it be?

• white tee or tank + white shorts :: This might be strange, but it's what I want to wear. It feels light + breezy to me right now.

If I only wore one outfit to work every day + didn't worry about how others interpret it...what would it be?

• soft, pale denim + a white tee :: This outfit feels effortless + light + soft + friendly, yet grounded to me.

I truly can imagine wearing these outfits over and over. A couple of pairs of jeans along with a few white tees could be enough for work. This takes the pressure off needing too many new things. I already have more than 2 pairs of pants that I like. I don't need very many tops that I like wearing with them. No need to feel a big deficit. 

With a list, a budget and a perspective in mind, I'm feeling kind of optimistic! :)

Love,
​Jane