what am i looking for? :: 02

I'd like to say that I've been able to kick my wanties once + for all. I'd like to say that I've found eternal peace + contentedness with my small, simple wardrobe...but it takes work for me. So I write about it here.

I find myself looking at clothes lately + not really even knowing why. I don't need an outfit for an event. I don't need a piece for a certain function. (Noted: That's a testament to the functionality of the collection I've assembled.) I might look at pieces that I know will not really fit my life where I live. What am I looking for?

Asking that question is an important part of my return trip toward liberation. It's the only thing I really have to share: Ask the question. So what am I looking for? Here are some of the ways I think I could answer that question lately:

I'm looking for/to...
-Something new...a new outlook...a new discovery...a new adventure
-A new definition of myself...adding a new edge...becoming more relevant or cute or cool
-Feelings of worth...worthy of love...worthy of respect
-Feel like I have something to offer
-Support a brand doing good work...be a part of the community they've created
-Acceptance into a group
-Prove that I matter
-Prove that I have good taste
-Prove that I am worthy of nice things
-A satisfied feeling...like feeling full
-Love
-Something to do
-that adrenaline rush that comes from pushing "submit order"
-Own a piece of art...something I admire...

All of this...even if it doesn't suit me or my life...even if it would be more satisfying in the long run to save our money or send it toward our mortgage...even if I don't need another piece of clothing...

I can also decide if I truly need something...because sometimes I do. Stuff is not bad. The overconsumption of stuff is the problem. When an item serves a purpose, and its fair production is taken into account...paying for it is justified. Caring for it + finding a place for it is satisfying.

If I find that I am really looking for something other than a necessary item, I can ask myself what would better satisfy my longing. Some thoughts:

-cranking music + dancing (Yoke Lore is my current favorite)
-yoga or stretching
-a glass of water
-a walk
-cooking something to share
-gardening
-some deep, intentional breaths
-making + savoring a cup of tea
-a chat

What are you looking for?

Love,
Jane